twentieth [[I’m committing an act of infidelity…]]

I know I have a lot of opinions on this issue and could be seen as somewhat of a hypocrite now that I’ve put this out for the public to read.

But, you know those times when you’re in a relationship that you know isn’t good, that you know isn’t right for you…but you make it seem better than what it really is, you put up a sort of façade. It’s like your SO attached that you can’t just leave, even if you know it’s not good for you. And then, one day you’re out and about and you meet this really great person and are just in awe about how great they are and how great of a boyfriend/girlfriend they’d make…but then you quickly remember how you shouldn’t even be thinking about that because you are in a relationship. But as you get to know that new person more and more, you quickly start realizing how perfect they could be…how being in that relationship makes a whole lot more sense than the one you’re currently in. That that new person is someone you’ve been looking for since you got into that first relationship…they’re everything you wanted…like if you had a checklist of what you look for in a potential boyfriend/girlfriend, you’d have no empty boxes.

So what do you do? It’s like the line from He’s Just Not That Into You: “What if you meet the love of your life…are you suppose to let them pass you by?”

When you know it could be better, that it would be better…do you just get up and leave? Should you feel bad about it, even if you know that your current relationship isn’t going to go anywhere? Even if it’s so bad that that current boyfriend/girlfriend knows it’s not going to get better than it already is, and y’all both know that it’s not going to be your “forever” relationship…that there’s no chance in hell it’ll make it to the marriage stage…because y’all both know that as much as it hurts to say that y’all aren’t “The One” for each other…you’re not his and he’s not yours.

Well, that’s what’s making this decision so difficult. I’ve always considered myself a very loyal person…I mean even in the smallest things: I always eat at the same places and order the same things, it’s so bad that even the people that work there know what to make as soon as I walk in. It’s weird.

Never in a million years did I think I’d ever have to think about this, but well, here goes:

I think I’m about to cheat on UT.

I think I’m going to move on and do what I really want to do and have wanted to do since I started thinking about “what I want to be when I grow up.” For those of you that don’t know, which is probably be most of you, I am in the process of getting into an art school to get a BFA in Graphic Design.

Definitely not where you were thinking this story was going, huh?